Thursday, May 25, 2006

Weekday Post #60: Head to Head – Nicknames

Both Star Wars and Star Trek feature several characters with nicknames. While nicknames are used as genial designations in both films, they are actually far from equal. Which film uses nicknames better? That’s the question that I’ll answer in today’s Head to Head.

Head to Head 2 – Nicknames
CharacterNicknameEvaluation
Anakin SkywalkerAniThis nickname takes an already stupid name and makes it dumber. However, it may be appropriate for the character since Anakin Skywalker’s pathetic Sith powers can only be described as “girlie” (no offense ladies) and ‘Ani’ is vaguely similar to the feminine name ‘Annie.’
Leonard H. McCoyBonesAs the chief medical officer of the U.S.S. Enterprise, Dr. McCoy must treat patients with many injuries, including broken bones. The Enterprise frequently encounters shock waves that send crewmembers falling over guardrails so Dr. McCoy has undoubtedly earned his clever nickname from the abundance of broken bones he has set.
C-3PO3POWhat kind of stupid nickname drops the first syllable but leaves the rest of the name? The only two examples I can think of are ‘3PO’ and known Stars Wars goon, Christopher ‘Topher’ Grace. Sorry C3PO, but a nickname that only reduces a four syllable name by 25% is not going to score you any points in this contest.
No NameQWhen you come from a race where no one has a name, it is only polite to give your human friends an easy to remember designation for yourself. With manners like that, it’s no wonder that Q is universally regarded as one of the most intelligent life forms in the Star Trek universe.
Jabba the HuttJabbaThis nickname serves only to belittle the character’s title. Since the Hutts are one of the few political forces that operate outside of the control of the Galactic Senate, it seems demonstrably discourteous to refer to Jabba casually. If this sort of callous indifference towards authority were to infect the Star Trek world, laypersons would be calling Captain Kirk by his first name. As one of the Star Wars militia’s favorite characters oft-times says, “How wude!”
Commander William T. Riker#1Many Star Wars goons express frustration with Commander Riker’s nickname since he is actually second in command. This attitude only demonstrates their ignorance since the name ‘#1’ refers to the fact that he is Captain Picard’s first choice for council and delegation. I applaud this nickname for its amazing symmetry. It is at once graceful and simple to understand for Star Trek fans, and confounding and incomprehensible to Star Wars goons.
ChewbaccaChewieI don’t even want to know why Han Solo calls his first mate ‘Chewie.’ Star Wars looses a point here for bad taste.
Montgomery ScottScottyA nickname that both plays off a characters name and heritage is a rare treat indeed. Is ‘Scotty’ a cutesy form of his last name or a shortening of Scotish? No one knows for sure, but what is certain is that you’ll find no such complexity in Star Wars.

Which films have the advantage? Obviously, Star Trek wins, no contest. Let no one tell you that Star Trek and Star Wars are the same because they both have nicknames in them again!

8 Comments:

At 11:45 PM, Blogger 357martini said...

Isn't Jabba his first name?

 
At 11:11 PM, Blogger William Shatner's #1 Fan said...

I don't know for sure about Jabba's name because I am not a Star Wars goon.

 
At 5:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear William Shatner's Cum Bucket:
You are a faggot if you think Star Wars sucks. You are a sissy little bitch who still steals your mom's People magazine to jerk off. Me and George Lucas are gonna come over there and beat the living shit out of you. Don't shoot us with your phaser, or I'll take out my light saber and give it to you like Warf gives it to the Feringi's.

 
At 6:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"The Hutt" isn't Jabba's Title, it's his race.

You contradict yourself several times in this blog entry.

Scottish is spelt with two "T"s.

It is, once again, completely biased.

Oh, and "scotty" is not a complex name, nor is "Q" or "#1" clever.

 
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